Long Islands, Snorkeling, and My Aching Green Heart

Well, you can see it, one Italian Long Island Iced Tea in and it's time to start dancing in front of the whole bar. Anyone who has ever had drinks with me know that I'm a dancing machine once my lips hit the glass, and I think there is enough Halloween webcam video to back up THAT assumption. Annnywayyys, I think it's important to outline some differences I've noticed between drinking in Italy and drinking in the States. For one, the rumors are true: generally wine is cheaper than or the same price as water. A large handful of Sicilians make their own wine, so most restaurants have their own stash of fresh Sicilian local wine (I still don't like wine but I'm entering a grin and bear it phase). Alongside that stands the fact that drinks of all sorts are stronger here, (see: the cappuccino). A Long Island is a notable challenge anywhere you go; I'll proudly accept the name "One and Done Vicky" when it comes to them, but then you get here and all the sugar packets in the world couldn't wipe the grimace off your face every time you take a swig. Every drink that we've ordered at the bars across the street stronger than all get out, and I'm not one to point fingers, but I feel like they get exponentially stronger as a huge group of well-dressed American girls enter the bar. Just sayin'. Without going on a rant about my feelings on the 21-year-old drinking age in the States, I'll just say that I love going out to bars, pools, and bars that are located in pools here. Across the street from the base, most people waste their weekends away at 4 classy locations: la discoteca, the bar, the hotel that has a swim-up bar, or the aptly named Studio 69 strip club. Choose your poison.

[A shout out to Mama and Papa Braun: Please take solace in the fact that I leave every drink unattended and begging for roofies, I go out alone and looking desperate, I make it a point to black out every night, and am involved in many a-orgy]

On the wine tasting we went to last weekend, after dessert they gave out shots of espresso (see: tar) with Grasso (see: fire water). With a higher alcohol content than Everclear, complimented by an extremely high rubbing-alcohol-flavor, it's used to promote digestion and/or burn the walls of your stomach and esophagus. They told us not to smoke or be around fire right after drinking it. Whether or not that was serious I'll never know, the only gist of Italian humor I can grasp is when they're laughing at me, not with.

Snorkeling

We went to Marzamemi on a boat and snorkel trip on the Fourth of July. It was beautiful, it was hot, not a cloud graced the sky and Mt. Etna kept her constant stream of smoke to herself. We took an hour or so ride out there with I think maybe 10 people total on the trip, loaded on a little boat and hit up some islands about 15 mins of the coast of Sicily. They were gorgeous huge Mafia owned houses and castles (like everything else). Most of them

were actually vacant, seeing as Sicily is a very poor, poverty-stricken region of Italy. It's not awful by any means, but you can see the evidence of it everywhere: the unemployment rate is about 50%, trash litters the streets in huge piles some places between cities, graffiti on beautiful historical monuments because they can't afford to be kept up. Everything is run by the Mafia, let me say that again: Everything is run by the mafia. When the US came to Sicily and asked to put a military base here, they had to get permission from the Mob, a fun fact to munch on.

Alas, there are more pressing issues than the poverty of Sicilia, like my absolute inability to snorkel without having a panic attack, my absolute hatred of seaweed, and my lack of smarts.

I freaked out the second I jumped in the water, I love the water, I love the beach, I love going out boating, but as my friend B-West can agree, the black deep part of the ocean, the ocean floor, and mostly every sea creature is absolutely frightening to me. My condolences, Brian, on your Hawaii snorkel mishap, much like mine. It took me about 20 minutes to get adjusted to everything and not freak out. Mainly I was just confused at the emotion of being frightened at a new, adventurous experience. This wasn’t the “I don’t know it so I’m afraid” type of nerves, this was me literally petrified, and that’s just something I don’t experience. I’m not afraid of heights, roller coasters etc, so this in itself was a new experience.

Once I got used to the snorkeling it was alright, there wasn’t a ton to see in the water, but we stopped a couple times and then went to the place where there were Greek ruins in the water and explored those for a little while. They were massive Greek columns on the ocean floor, about maybe 7 or 8 meters down? For some reason I had this picture in my head of glistening, white, Greek glory, and was a little let down by the grayed, sea-moss covered mess, but nonetheless it was breathtaking.

Since you’re wondering- yes, I fell asleep while lying out on the boat. Yes, I got massively sunburned all over my body. Yes, I’m in immense amounts of constant pain, and every part of my body where I once had awful tanlines from our one-piece guarding suits, is now soaked in blistering red madness. No, I didn’t learn my lesson the first time. No, I don’t think God is planning on ceasing his punishment on me for my undying stupidity any time soon.

Later on in the day we threw down the anchor (a giant brick?) and the crazy Italian men busted out a barbeque and 45 minutes later (Sigh… Italians) started making a traditional Sicilian BBQ for us. Olives, cheese, salami, bruscetta, and then grilled sausage and beef slices. The traditional part being the food, the Sicilian factor- the freshness. Bought at the market that morning, like in 90% of the meals one will find here.

We snorkeled some more, took a lot of underwater pictures, got up really close to this natural preserve island that we weren’t allowed to actually walk on, saw a hole in the ground that looked like something scary would live in, turned around screaming and swimming as fast as I could all the way to the boat, stopped panicking 5 minutes later. They also had some GIANT ASS clams here. Clams? Oysters? I don’t know what the difference is, nor do I particularly care seeing as seafood is awful, but hey, it was cool to see.

Annnnnnd without finishing my final segment entitled, “My Aching Green Heart,” I will wrap up. That is a story for another day.